Holding Out HELP

“Helping, Encouraging, and Loving Polygamists”

Three friends with arms around each other's shoulders walking across a grassy field with mountains in the background.

Their story

Holding Out HELP began in 2008 when a family escaping a polygamist community showed up with nothing at the home of founder Tonia Tewell. Seeing the deep trauma and isolation people faced in these closed groups, Tewell realized that leaving meant losing all support at once. To reach people still inside, the group chose a neutral name—HELP, which stands for Helping, Encouraging, and Loving Polygamists. This approach helped them avoid suspicion from community leaders and connect directly with those who needed help. Today, this nonprofit helps people move from isolation to independence. They offer free safe housing, food, case management, and trauma therapy, giving survivors the support they need to start over. By offering both protection and practical guidance, Holding Out HELP has changed thousands of lives and shown that real freedom starts by meeting people where they are.

Close-up of a middle-aged woman with blonde hair wearing a yellow blazer, sitting on a beige couch with a thoughtful expression, hand resting on chin, in a cozy room with a bookshelf in the background.

Committed to Change

Holding Out HELP has helped more than 1,700 men, women, and children adjust to life outside their former communities. Many of these clients, about 92%, have faced serious, ongoing abuse. The organization offers free, long-term housing and support programs, giving crucial help to people who often leave with no money or family support. Nearly 90% of those they serve start over with nothing.

  • Three friends hugging and walking together in a grassy field with a fence, surrounded by mountains and a pine forest in the background.

  • A person standing on rocks by the ocean during sunset, with the sun behind them and a ship visible on the horizon.

  • A woman in a red floral dress and beige hat sits in a grassy field, hugging two young boys, one on her lap and the other leaning on her shoulder, during sunset.

  • A couple smiling and enjoying in a grassy field with yellow flowers on a cloudy day.

  • A young girl hugging Santa Claus, who is sitting in a chair, while a woman dressed as Mrs. Claus sits nearby. There is a decorated Christmas tree with ornaments and lights in the background.

  • A woman and a man in business attire standing together, both smiling, in an ornate room with wood paneling and yellow patterned wallpaper, during a formal event.

"When I left, I didn't just leave a house or a neighborhood; I left my entire universe. I had no ID, no money, and no understanding of how the 'outside' worked. Holding Out HELP didn't just give me a bed—they held my hand through the terror of learning how to exist in a completely new world."

"Coming from a background where you are taught from birth that the outside world is evil, knocking on their door took every ounce of courage I had. They met me with nothing but unconditional love, and for the first time in my life, I felt safe."

"I spent my whole life being told what to think, what to wear, and who I belonged to. Through the therapy and the mentoring here, I learned that my voice matters. They didn't tell me who to be; they gave me the tools to figure out who I wanted to be."

"The hardest part of leaving polygamy is the isolation. You lose your family and your entire community in one day. Holding Out HELP gave me a new community of people who understood my past but were focused entirely on my future."

"Coming from a background where you are taught from birth that the outside world is evil, knocking on their door took every ounce of courage I had. They met me with nothing but unconditional love, and for the first time in my life, I felt safe."

"They helped me with everything from getting my GED and learning how to open a bank account, to finding a lawyer who could help me navigate the court system. I honestly do not know where my children and I would be without them. They saved our lives."

"I left with absolutely nothing but the clothes on my back and a broken spirit. Today, thanks to the housing and deep trauma therapy I received completely for free, I am self-sufficient, confident, and my kids are thriving in a life free from fear."

Why this foundation impacts me

Holding Out HELP speaks to me because it confronts the exact mechanisms of institutional betrayal, religious trauma, and psychological control that I study. I find it egregious how modern high-control groups deliberately manipulate and cherry-pick scripture, twisting it to serve a self-important narrative that strays from God's true intentions and teachings. These oppressive systems weaponize faith and abuse power, manipulating secular legal systems in the name of religion to shield predators and hide horrific crimes from the law.

In the face of such calculated abuse, it's inspiring to see the strategic cleverness of the foundation's "Trojan Horse" acronym, which outmaneuvers patriarchal leaders, attracts those caught up in these institutions that don’t know better, and hands victims a literal lifeline. By coupling physical protection with pathways to higher education, Holding Out HELP gives survivors the concrete tools to escape dangerous, toxic environments and rewrite their futures. The stories of these resilient members are powerful, and the foundation's work functions as a vital testament to what it means to truly restore justice and human dignity.

A smiling couple hugging outdoors in a field, with the woman holding a small plant in her hand.
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